Have you ever had a "suffering hero" complex—a state of self-pity in which you felt everyone was down on you? Chances are, you probably have. Most of us have it at least once in a great while.
But, with some people, this complex becomes a fixed mental habit. When such persons are denied what they want—even though they may not deserve it— they begin to feel sorry for themselves and to place the blame on others. They usually set out to win sympathy for their cause, and often lead many others into an attitude of bitterness toward those who, in their view, are persecuting them or not giving them the answer or decision they want.
Psychologists are quite familiar with this complex. Every organization or business of any size has its share. And, in nearly every case, one factor seems to be constant with these individuals. They place the blame for their troubles and lack of success upon their leaders, whose position and success they secretly envy. Yet they are unwilling or unable to take the steps to produce the fruit in their own lives that would entitle them to similar position and success.
Christian "Martyrs"
Brethren in God's Church, even with God's Spirit, are subject to all the temptations and deceits of human nature, one of which can be the tendency some show to regard themselves as persecuted "martyrs" or "suffering heroes," if they are unable to have their own way in Church matters or in problems with other Church members.
Jesus Christ was never inclined to feel "put down" or to get into a bad attitude, thinking He was not allowed to have His own way. Just before He had to give His life in an agonizing death on the cross, Jesus prayed, "Father, if it is Your will, take this cup away from Me; nevertheless not My will, but Yours, be done" (Luke 22:42).
Jesus was still flesh and blood, and He dreaded what was coming. But He surrendered His own will, that God's will might be done. Jesus was not too concerned about His feelings or having His own way on that night before the crucifixion. If He had been, we would be without a Savior!
In spite of Jesus' example, some who call themselves Christians are continually feeling "hurt"—either by imagining that they are being persecuted, or by sympathizing with someone else whom they mistakenly believe is a victim of unjust treatment.
Sympathize with Sin?
Nearly everyone tends to sympathize with a "victim." However, too few people realize that in God's Church, such sympathies are in many cases actually against God Himself and the way of God! In plain language, anyone who thinks that God is correcting a person unjustly is actually sympathizing with Satan the devil!
Yes, we should love those who have erred. But too many people fail to distinguish between the love we should have for such people, and the inappropriate active "sympathy" we should not have for their wrong choices or way of life.
Naturally, when we speak of having "sympathy" with sin, we mean the attitude of condoning and agreeing with the wrong principle involved. We should have compassion on sinners, just as Christ did.
God loves His children. Yet, we read in Hebrews 12:6, "For whom the Lord loves He chastens, and scourges every son whom He receives." God's chastening is not something that we enjoy, but we know He does it for our ultimate good.
In like manner, the true ministers of Jesus Christ have the responsibility of correcting and rebuking the Church (Titus 2:15). Jesus gave His ministers the authority, under God, to make binding decisions in their function of teaching and directing the Church (Matthew 16:19, 18:18).
In matters involving the governing and directing of the Church, Christians are commanded to obey those whom Christ has used in faithfully preaching the word to them and in bringing them to the truth (Hebrews 13:7, 17). Such true ministers are responsible to Christ for ruling His Church, and He will guide them with the Holy Spirit.
In doing so, God's ministers need to make a great many decisions in directing the Work of the Church— decisions that may be misconstrued if all the facts are not known, or if human reason is used to pervert the facts. And remember: no one should try to appoint himself as a minister, an elder or a teacher, or to any other position in God's Church.
God's Direction
How do we know when God is working with and directing an individual? The answer is found in the Scriptures. In Luke 6:12–16, we find the account of how Jesus prayed all night to God for guidance before "He chose twelve whom He also named apostles."
Not one of these men appointed himself. Jesus chose each one. Later, He told them, "You did not choose Me, but I chose you" (John 15:16).
After Jesus ascended to heaven and the Church began to grow, the apostles found that too much of their time was being taken up with physical service, which others could perform. So, they asked the brethren to "seek out from among you seven men of good reputation, full of the Holy Spirit and wisdom, whom we may appoint over this business" (Acts 6:3).
Notice that these men were appointed by the apostles, who had already been specially called and chosen by Jesus. They did not appoint themselves.
Later, a man named Saul was feverishly engaged in persecuting and destroying the Church, when Christ struck him down and blinded him, and brought him to repentance. One of the disciples, Ananias, was told in a vision: "he is a chosen vessel of Mine to bear My name before Gentiles, kings, and the children of Israel" (Acts 9:15). Even after God specially chose the Apostle Paul, He confirmed his choice by revealing it to someone who was already in God's Church.
Paul tells us, "And God has appointed these in the church: first apostles, second prophets, third teachers, after that miracles, then gifts of healings, helps, administrations, varieties of tongues" (1 Corinthians 12:28).
Here we find that it is God who sets people in positions of authority in His Church.
Notice that, in every case, God revealed a person's calling to those who were already in authority in His Church—either the apostles themselves, or the prophets or the elders and teachers whom they had appointed through God's direction.
God's Church was governed and supervised from the top down. When calling or choosing someone for an office in the Church, God always worked through those He had already set in authority. That way, there would be no division or confusion in His Church. That is God's way, the revealed Bible way. We need to follow it!
Training Necessary
Another fundamental fact, which few realize, is that God always used men who were trained and prepared for the work to which He called them.
Moses was reared in the Pharaoh's palace, where he would be trained and schooled in the knowledge of the Egyptians, one of the most cultured peoples of that time (Exodus 2).
Daniel was instructed in all the wisdom and learning of the Chaldeans, the greatest nation of that era (Daniel 1:4).
The apostles were first called disciples or students. They were trained and schooled for more than three years by Jesus Christ Himself.
Paul, the apostle to the Gentiles, was prepared for his mission by studying at the feet of Gamaliel, recognized as probably the greatest Jewish teacher of that time.
In modern times, Mr. Herbert W. Armstrong was prepared for his worldwide ministry by being led to enter the advertising and publishing field, where he received the special kind of training necessary to prepare him for conducting the Work using radio, television and the printing press.
Christ has promised to be with and specially guide His called servants in matters of Church government and discipline (Matthew18:15–20). That is the way that Christ rules the true Church.
Even so, there will be problems in God's Church. And not all of these problems will be solved to everyone's complete satisfaction. This is because very few people keep close enough to God to know His will in directing the Church. So, when personal desire and ambitions enter into the picture, it is easy even for a converted person to let self-will get in the way of God's will.
These factors will give opportunity for those who continue in self-will to cry out that they are being treated unfairly, or that they are martyrs or "victims." You need to realize this, and ask God to help you get all sides of the case before jumping to a hasty and wrong conclusion!
Jesus Guides His Church!
Although Jesus specially promised to guide His ministers in exercising their authority to "bind" or "loose" in applying God's law to a particular case, He did not promise that they would never make a mistake. Paul told the Ephesian elders whom he ordained: "from among yourselves men will rise up, speaking perverse things, to draw away the disciples after themselves" (Acts 20:30).
So, even though they diligently seek God's direction, God's ministers today may make a few human errors in their decisions, including their appointment of elders, deacons or others to offices in the Church. But that is for Christ to judge! God's ministers are responsible to Him.
If God's ministers seem a little slow in appointing someone to an office in the Church, or if they appear to have made a mistake in such an appointment or in any other decision they may need to make, the truly Christian thing to do is not to criticize and condemn, but to get down on your knees before God, and ask Him to show God's ministers His will, to rebuke and chasten us if necessary— and to guide us in directing His Church, as He has promised to do.
And, while you are at it, you had better ask God to show you if you are the one who is wrong! The Bible reveals that when individuals disagreed with God's called servants, those individuals were nearly always the ones who were wrong (3 John 1:9–10; 2 Timothy 1:15).
In the past, Jesus has always directed His Church and His true servants so that they were far more fair and just in directing the Church than others would have been.
Jesus is "the same yesterday, today and forever" (Hebrews 13:8). Think it over!
Knowing that the true Church of God is a spiritual organism which Christ rules and directs through His ministers, we should be very careful not to let Satan put into us a spirit of antagonism against them. Once God has shown you where He is working in carrying the true Gospel to the world, and whom He is using in this ministry, you should obey them in matters of Church government and direction.
In matters of faith, you should follow them as they follow Christ (1 Corinthians 11:1). This way leads to unity, peace and love as God intends. It avoids strife and confusion, which are of the devil.
How to Provide Real Help!
If occasions arise where brethren around you have become disgruntled over a supposed injustice, you should remind yourself that Christ has promised to guide His Church into all truth—and you should ask Him to do that. If people in the Church feel they have been wronged or discriminated against by God's servants—and if they come to you looking for sympathy— you should help them. Yes, you should help them! God shows you how.
First, find the real reason for their attitude. You will not be helping if you actively sympathize with their supposed cause. This will only make them feel more secure in their error, and seem to substantiate their feeling of bitterness.
If possible, you should try to point out their mistake, help them to get their minds off their own selfish desires and warn them in a loving way that such an attitude among God's people is one that the devil is working day and night to bring about (1 Peter 5:8).
Whatever you do, do not succumb to an aggrieved person's attitude yourself, or let the person make you embittered to the extent that you reject God's truth and thereby fail to gain eternal life. Yes, the embittered— and those who sympathize with them—may well even be in danger of the lake of fire. History has shown that if people allow themselves to become embittered and reject a minister, they usually end up rejecting Christ's message!
It just does not pay to fight God's true servants. When the men of Israel became angry because of Samuel's sons and wanted to reject Samuel, God said, "they have not rejected you, but they have rejected Me, that I should not reign over them" (1 Samuel 8:7).
The problem of distinguishing between sympathy and true compassion will always be solved if brethren are willing to obey God's will, which He expresses by directing the Church through His called and chosen ministers— and if all of us pray earnestly that God will protect His Church and keep it free from strife and division. Christ's Body, the true Church, is not to be divided (1 Corinthians 1:13). Only by working together can we carry out the worldwide mission Christ has given to all in His Church.