We can tell from the Bible that women should not be ashamed of their bodies. When God created Eve, He made her beautiful, and women are designed to want to be that way. The Apostle Peter acknowledges that women indeed want to be beautiful, and he reminds them that the truest beauty is far more than skin deep (1 Peter 3:3). A Christian woman’s character needs to be beautiful, and every godly woman wants to be beautiful on both the inside and the outside.
It is appropriate for women to desire to be beautiful in public, as well as in private. But that is not the same as being what the world calls “sexy”—by definition, sexually suggestive or stimulating. We should be mindful of our goal when we choose how to dress. Certainly we do not want to tempt others to view us as objects of lust, so we should think about something Jesus taught while He was expanding God’s law: “I say to you that whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart” (Matthew 5:28).
Consider this in light of the example of Job, a man about whom God said, “there is none like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, one who fears God and shuns evil” (Job 1:8). We note Job’s words, “I have made a covenant with my eyes; why then should I look upon a young woman?” (Job 31:1). But this doesn’t mean Job had taken an oath of celibacy—we read about a Mrs. Job, and while God replaced their children, Scripture does not indicate that she was ever replaced. Their three daughters were even called the most beautiful women in the land (Job 42:15).
So, we can assume that Job was attracted to his wife— that, after the most difficult trial in his life, he went to her for love and comfort after he felt accepted again by his Creator. It’s safe to assume that Job loved Mrs. Job with all his heart and gave her lots of physical affection. If he was going to “look upon a woman,” it was going to be his woman.
Now imagine that we live down the street from Job. When we walk our dog in our short-shorts and crop-top, Job has to look away. When he goes to the Church picnic and plays softball, he has a hard time looking in our direction, because our sleek-fitting yoga pants show our muscles flexing and unflexing with every step. When he gives a sermon, he must refrain from looking at us as he addresses the audience, because our keyhole blouse and pencil-skirt view is distracting.
Job is righteous, and he seeks to avoid lust. This doesn’t make him a eunuch—he is a fully functioning adult male with a wife and many children. But as a man of God, walking in the same godly standards as our modern-day brothers in Christ, Job is practicing the very point Jesus taught thousands of years later, and he is not interested in gawking at any woman who is not his wife.
But does that mean that Job’s neighbors should feel comfortable wearing the kinds of tight and revealing outfits that force him to look away? No, this doesn’t seem fair—and it eventually causes Job to ignore his female neighbors who dress in that way, no doubt greatly reducing his interest in knowing those neighbors as friends.
Sisters in Christ
With this in mind when we consider clothing options, we should be aware of our modern sexualized society and recognize that, even inside the Church, not all men are up to Job’s level of righteousness yet. A man may not plan to look, but the shock of seeing certain outfits within the congregation may leave him gawking until he comes to his senses and repents. Why make your brother stumble?
Satan wants to destroy the family, and part of his plan involves reducing women to objects for sexual gratification— and reducing men to puppets of their sexual lusts. Men and boys are not inherently disgusting, sex-crazed beings—but they are designed to notice women. God designed “the way of a man with a virgin” (Proverbs 30:18–19), and godly men want to have that “way” only with their wives. Our culture of multiple sexual partners has removed that loyalty. As a result, men in general are often accused of thinking only about sex, which is unfair; since women are not objects to be gawked at, we shouldn’t dress as though we are.
The devil has confused women with arguments that we have the right to dress however we want, and that it’s up to our brothers not to ogle. It’s true that, if our brothers are like Job and have made a covenant with their eyes, they won’t ogle. But why should we make their God-given task harder? If we do, we’re only training our brothers to avoid looking at us as they strive to obey God. As daughters of God, we, too, are responsible for how we represent our Father, the Head of our Household.
So, when we go out in public, let’s look in the mirror and be objective: Am I wearing this because it makes me look appropriate for the situation I’ll be in, or because it makes me look sexy? If it’s the latter, let’s choose not to wear it, embracing our roles as sisters in Christ.
Editor’s Note: This article has been adapted from material found at LivingYouth.org, where you can find other items of interest to Church youth and their families, such as the Living Youth Podcast.